Friday, February 24, 2017


How the fuck is anyone who made it through grade school unable to distinguish between LEGAL and ILLEGAL immigration?

Bawling and whining

I get the feeling with the Left at the moment that they just can't get over the idea that their parents said no to the fourth glass of Grape Kool-Aid.  But they really WANT it.  They had some before and they want more NOW.  NOW.  NOW.

You want to be gay.  Fine.

You want to get married.  Fine.

You want to dress up like a girl and pretend you are a girl. Weird, but fine.

You want to tell ME what gender you are?  And change it whenever you want to?  Full stop.  You know what, let's just call it quits with the demands for a while.

And if you want to throw a fit, fine.  The cop videos continue to get better.  And if the cops won't do their jobs, at some point the silent majority will not be silent any more.

Audit the Fed

Now is the time.  Is the gold in Fort Knox?  Nobody in government knows.  New York?  Nobody in government knows.  Do member banks routinely vote themselves the creation of hundreds of billions of dollars?  That one, likely yes.  They call it Quantitative Easing, and tell us the on-going dilution of the value of our money, which is profitable for them, is somehow essential to an on-going economic "growth" which does little to make the average American work less for the same money, despite continual productivity gains.

The giant, silent sucking sound at the center of our economy is that of people doing EXACTLY what Marx accused Capitalists of doing: getting rich while contributing nothing inherently useful.  An industrialist has to build a factory.  A banker just has to create the money to loan to the industrialist, and they both get rich, even though only one of them actually makes anything.

Ford was right and wrong when he said, approximately  "it is probably a good thing most Americans don't understand our financial system: if they did, they would be up in arms by tomorrow morning."  He was wrong, in that they SHOULD be made to understand, to care, and to force our elected representatives to fix this system.

Auditing the Fed of course is just the beginning.  It is the institution of fractional reserve banking itself, which it serves to support, which needs to be ended.  It is theft.  Monetary inflation is theft.  It is theft which does sometimes benefit the economy, but without which, the economy overall would not long need.

Everyone a Capitalist ought to be the proper motto of the Right and the Left.

Thursday, February 23, 2017


What is coming to me is that addiction is the dealing of evil to oneself.  There is an awareness, a cosmic, Primary Process level awareness, of evil that has been done.  But it hard, so very hard, to confront evil on its own level, to feel it breathing in your face, and to know that it, too, is you.  It is not out there.  As weak as you may feel, something within you feels power, and perhaps the ONLY power it can find is the ability to sabotage everything you do.

Here is the thing: yes, of course, various chemicals can cause with overuse over time physiological dependency, but most people get off them long enough at least once in their lives to be physiologically free.  Most people who die of heroin overdoses, if I had to guess, have been scared enough at least once to give it up for a month or more, which would I think be sufficient.

Why do they relapse?  Because some part of them wants them to fail, because failing is easier than confronting the evil in them, that was done to them, suffered by them. It is a wrenching, extraordinarily unpleasant feeling.  Everything is suddenly floating, and nothing is certain, but underneath it all is an aggressive darkness.  The trick is to learn it is not after anyone or anything.  It simply eats what is in its path, whatever presents itself to it.  And addiction is a sacrifice to it, a self sacrifice, one which does in fact often end in premature death physically, and emotional death--or disfigurement--long before that.

As I'm sure I've mentioned, rats given an adequate amount of social contact and play time never get addicted to cocaine, no matter how often it is offered to them. Cocaine is not a solution to a problem they have.  It is the lonely, dispirited rats which originally made people think Cocaine itself had some intrinsic magical addictive power.

To surrender to evil is not to give it power.  It is to recognize the power you have been giving it, without realizing it.  It is saying "you are there and I am here.  I see you.  I recognize you.  And now I am going to choose to live my life without you, but without forgetting you are there."

I think in many addicts (and my own addiction has never really risen to this level; by most standards, I think, it has been balanced and moderate, even if the absolute quantities might scare some people) the bottle, or spoon, or needle comes to seem to be the enemy.  But it is the enemy they can't do without.  It is something that hates them that they willingly submit to.

In my own heart, I feel I did this with one and likely both of my parents.  They were abusive, but there was always an outward patina of fun and "we didn't really mean it.  It's all in your head".  It wasn't in my head, but that sort of thing fucks with your brain.  So I went along to get along.  That's what kids are forced to do.

So you have this double bind.  You have an abusive situation you have to endure, and you have the lies you have to tell to make it all work, like "they really love me; they just don't know how to show it".  Or in my own case, dissociation and retreat from reality and a sort of passive acceptance of everything, like I was in a trance.

And you learn to endure the abuse, and to rationalize the abuse, and to make excuses for the abuse.  But you don't say that to yourself.  You come to make the abnormal seem normal.

And this is where addiction comes in: addiction UNDERSTANDS that you are an abnormal person trying to live in normal world, but that being abnormal is how you feel normal.  When you check out in one way or another, that is when you return to something you know, or knew. When you leave the social universe, that is when you can be your real self.

So Keith Richards had it right and wrong when he talked about what people do to "not be themselves" for a few hours.  I would argue who he was normally, when he wasn't high, never felt normal to him at all.

And the pretending is exhausting.  Trying to explain yourself to people who don't listen, who often are dealing with similar issues themselves: far better a consistent narcotic.

I am speaking out loud here, but these are some thoughts floating through my mind as I try for sobriety again, with some warranted hope, I think, that this time it may actually take.

Honest shadow work

At the bottom of most of us is a primordial ooze.  It is an unpleasant, thick, goo, and it is where all our reflexive habit and thought patterns are stuck.  If you are stuck--and pretty much all of us are stuck--there has to be a stuck place.  The image that came to me for this is ooze, something like, if I might borrow from the Talking Heads, vaseline with sand in it.

I find it a bit comical watching people, particularly self identified "Nice People", try and do shadow work.  Oh, they might say, I just care too much sometimes.  I get too wrapped up in other people's problems.  Sometimes at the end of the day I find myself a bit irritable.  And just the other day I said something mean to my sister.

Honest shadow work is feeling deeply your own participation in evil.  You are capable of being happy when you read someone who once crossed you got run over by a car.  You are capable of feeling silent approval when self identifying "anti-Fascists" use Fascist tactics against Trump supporters.

Doing shadow work is not an idle or easy process.

And I will do a little more on myself.  I have been contemplating putting up a post titled "how big an asshole are you?", dealing with shadow work, but as I look in the mirror, what I realize is that I say all sorts of shit I probably shouldn't say.  I speculate about the depth of people's internal emotional states, when I myself am not even capable yet of feeling deep love or affection.  I don't know what I don't know, yet somehow I find myself preaching.

Some of the most basic things other people do naturally, I don't understand. I don't trust anyone fully (although to be sure, I don't know many trustworthy people).

But seeing all this is to the good.  If one thing becomes manifest, its opposite will sooner or later manifest too.  That has been my problem: I could not get distance on any of this, could not make it concrete, could not precipitate it so I could learn from it.

Resist not Evil

I think I am psychologically ready now to sleep through the night.  I have some issues with snoring that wake me up, but I am intelligent and have good solutions in place. I have always known what to do: I just could not bring myself to feel I was worth doing it for.

Over the past 3-4 days I have felt this constant presence of the feeling of evil.  And what I realize is that what was done to me was very wrong, and that part of me reacted as was inevitable--by internalizing some of that malice--and directing it at myself.  I do not treat myself the way I would other people, and never have. I realized that I have always felt like a stranger, and not an important one at that.

I have covered this up, of course, with self importance, continual outrage, prodigious marathons of abstraction, and proactive anger which has likely sometimes extended into bullying.

But what I feel is that there is an evil in this world, and that we need to accept it.  We cannot do away with it.  It is part and parcel of this place, of this plane of existence.    Treating it as exceptional or unusual is to fail to understand how things are and always have been.  This does not mean we should not oppose it physically and concretely, but there is a spirit in the air, and it is in all of us.  To become fully calm, we have to know and accept that we all have wild beasts within us, and that those who perform acts of evil are not as different from the rest of us as we would like.

And I think if we are honest, most of us do commit small acts of anger, of venom, of dishonest, passive aggression, of disconnection and banishment, etc.

As Christ said: let he who is without sin cast the first stone. So often, I think, we punish others because we are loathe to acknowledge our own short-comings.  Judging others is so much easier than judging ourselves, and it is so much more pleasant to direct self loathing into self righteousness, anger, and violence.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

John Podesta

Here is the email where he talks about playing dominos.

In context--he has received a gift of cheese, rather than the usual gift of pasta--this can be explained in a non-sinister way.

You could spin it, of course, in other ways, but this is not the smoking gun I thought it was.


As I may have shared at some point, I used to carry a pocket copy of Sun Tzu's "Art of War" with me.  In that era we have now forgotten before smart phones, I would pull it out and read it when I had a few spare minutes.  At the top of all considerations, you need the Way, or Tao.  You need mojo.  It is an indefinable something, but it is quite real.  The Patriots have it. Back in the day, the 49'ers had it.

Trump has it.

But we are looking at a long, long hard slog in the days ahead.  The battle lines are drawn. The enemies of freedom have shown their true colors.  They include all people capable of voting for today's Democrats, and a significant segment of the Republican Party.  What we have seen with the Bill Kristols and the National Review and the Never Trump'ers is that, as is the case with the Left, ideological purity is much more important to them than concrete action, than accomplishment.  They insist on a sort of collegiality with the Left which, at the end of the day, does not allow them to draw any solid or enduring MORAL distinctions between their own ideas and those of the Left.  They would dispute this, of course, but I would say that in practical terms, Trump has done more in a short period to unmask the collectivist and totalitarian agenda of the American Left than they have in 50 years.  Practically, they are irrelevant.  But they still oppose Trump.

And perhaps most importantly, and this is the point of this post, we have what is called "The Deep State".  It is good we are seeing this term appear in orthodox conversations.  They are perhaps the source of all the surface confusion and attack.

But who are they, and what do they want?  Are they homogeneous, or diverse?  Are their aims clear or confused and conflicting?  How could they be identified?

Sun Tzu teaches that any idiot can attack their enemies.  True strategists attack their PLANS.  And if it is true that the Deep State is the real enemy--and it seems that the media is simply one of their tools, even if the most obvious and ubiquitous one--then Trump needs to attack their Way, their plans.

Obviously, this is a foggy group.  But I do have one idea which appeals to me on all levels: take seriously the idea that the power elite engage in systematic pedophilia.  That pizza place in Washington was a nexus of the power elite in our Capital, and something was very definitely wrong there.  Find Anthony Weiner's laptop and find out if it contained what Eric Prince said it contained.  Put a full time task force on the job of finding out if there is any truth to these rumors.  One arrest may lead to another to another to another.

My gut sense is that the wealthiest people on this planet, in general, are sick.  The government of the United States, though, is more powerful, if it is directed properly.

Monday, February 20, 2017

What would be intelligent

Would be using this whole Milo fiasco to LEARN.  Who is he, really?  What do his experiences say about homosexuality generally?  What unspoken truths about the process of becoming gay can we put into the public domain?  There are some obvious stories here which might be illuminating, if the bastards trying to crucify him had the capacity to listen and learn.

Removing people from discussions is, in my own view, disgusting, especially if they are thoughtful, and capable of expressing themselves.

How the fuck do you learn when you lock people out?  Who wants to confine what they are pleased to call a "conversation" to like-minded people?  Idiots.  That is who.  Determined idiots, who want to remain that way.

In my own world, it is perfectly OK to criticize people, but if you think throwing them into the pit is an interesting, clever, or effective solution, then you are my enemy. Engage with them.  Insult them if you need to, but listen to their responses.  Solve problems.  Hear the songs of human diversity and difference, even if they repulse you.

And fuck you National Review, on general principle.  Fucking Quislings, you sacks of shit.  You are worse than the Left.  We expect them to betray us.  That is who they are, and do not claim to be anything else. I really hope your publication fails badly.

Perhaps, I should say MORE. I'm not sure where it stands, since I haven't read an NR article in at least six months.

I remember staying after school in high school to read that magazine.  I loved it.  But blue bloods can be traitors too, can't they?  

There is this swirling mix all of us must confront daily, if we are honest.  I don't know where it is going.  I know that Donald Trump is a very disciplined and determined human being, and he seems to be surrounding himself with people like himself.

I will offer one thought exercise: if you lost power for a week, how much of the news could possible affect you directly?  Does the Education Secretary really make a difference?  Trumps comments on Sweden?  Whatever the other fucking manufactured controversy de jour is?  No: it has no impact on your life.  You would have no way of knowing, even if Trump decided to fuck Melania on the White House lawn.  Everything you know, and thus everything you are reacting to, is funneled to you second, third, or fourth hand.  It does not affect the smell of freshly mown grass, the beauty of snow, the formation of clouds, or the course of a day not lived in abstraction and distraction.

Hunger for authentic feeling

I was in the gym today, looking at six different TV's, tuned to 6 different channels, and it hit me that every person watching every one of those channels is waiting for emotion of some sort.  They pay for it, I'm sure, in reality TV: the people who seem to feel big, real, feelings.

There is a hole in the center of our world.

The real Trump tragedy

The Kum of Kum Nye is linguistically equivalent to the Buddhist Shunyata, in my understanding, or Void.  Thus it could be translated as "movement in space".  It asks the question where consciousness "is".  Is it here, or there?  Can it be located?

Often we are encouraged to realize--not visualize, but realize--that the boundaries of the sense of the body are porous.  Where we connect with the air is ambiguous.  We know that all matter is mostly space, do we not?  The empirical difference between space occupied by our bodies, and space NOT occupied by our bodies is quite small.  Ponder this a moment.

For my own purposes, the small difference I would draw, though, is that space is FULL, and only slightly more--or perhaps less, which is an interesting thought in itself--full where we are present.

The Void of the Buddhists is, in my considered view, the same as the Quantum Vacuum or Zero Point Field posited by Quantum physicists.  It is a field of nearly infinite energy.  It was used some years ago to DERIVE F=MA, where the field itself constituted the cause of inertia and drag. Perhaps mass itself.  There are a whole lot of things to unpack from this largely ignored, but completely mainstream idea.

But the point I wanted to make is that there is a large Ku which I seem to sometimes swim in.

And what I see is that all these people buying into these lunatic ideas about Trump, those who have been buying into the lunacy of the Left in general, have NOWHERE ELSE TO GO.  Their families are cold and disconnected.  Their social experience has been insipid and superficial.  Much of their lives is spent consuming media of various sorts: watching TV and movies, playing video games, listening to music someone else created.  When they are with people, they bring the plastic of the media they consume with them.

How often have you found yourself having conversations which consisted in the main in comparing scenes in movies you both have seen?  How often have you felt, truly felt, deep pain, deep joy, deep connection, deep sadness, a deep sense of purpose?  For far too many of us, rarely or never.

You go by, week by week, month by month, decade by decade, and nothing important is said.  Nothing important happens.  Perhaps you get married to someone you don't really know, because you don't even know yourself.  Perhaps you get divorced for some stupid reason.

Children seem to bring a sense of meaning and purpose to many of us, but so many people in the West and Japan are not having children.

What is there?  A shallow grave in which you eventually root, and a death which merely marks, formally, a long term process of dissolution.

What the Left has long marketed is belonging, membership, passion, purpose.  It is a lunatic cult, which categorically rejects individual growth, nuance, and ideosyncrasy; it rejects, in other words, everything which makes life worthwhile and interesting.  But it offers excitement, the same way sex does.  It offers belonging, the same way cults do.

It is a plastic way of life.  There is nothing authentically human or caring about it.  But it gets you from one side to the other.

Thus, what Trump has REALLY brought into stark relief is the moral and emotional poverty of large segments of the industrialized world.  They no longer speak as human beings.  They no longer recognize reason and proportion.  They no longer possess the capacity to form individual judgments.  Every cultural improvement over the past 4,000 years is lost on them.  They long to return to an era of tribalism, rapine, and cultural solipsism, because they do not know what to do with the gift of awareness, and have rejected a priori the possibility of personal authenticity and growth.

My fate

As I have periodically shared, going to bed without drinking is like packing for a nighttime combat mission.  I don't know for sure what's going to happen, but I know it will not be pleasant.

As far as addiction, any physiological withdrawals don't last more than three days or so, and all physical effects are gone within a month or so.

I have gone three months with no alcohol, with no reduction in symptoms, which leads to me to conclude that my shaking and other symptoms have nothing to do with drinking, although short term withdrawals may exacerbate them.

Having tried every other possibility, it seems my only option is to go through these things and learn to live without fear.

Last night was particularly bad.  It was like someone hit me with an electric shock about every ten minutes the first half of the night.  At some point, I was hit about every 5 seconds for minutes at a time.  Eventually, I fell asleep from sheer body fatigue.

At some point, I found myself saying DOWENT TAYEEK, which I realized was probably an infant version of "don't take".  I am told I was very, very attached to my pacifier--which was likely one of the only things I trusted to calm me down--and as with everything else they did, my parents likely took it precipitously one day without explanation.

But here is the interesting thing: I calmed down after that came out.  It was a moment, frozen within me, which thawed, finally. I reached, got in touch with, some primal part of me, and opened a line of communication, of understanding, of respect and listening.

On many surface and internal layers I have neurosis and difficult emotional pain.  But I really think at the very core of the thing, of my self, there is an indefatigable and absolutely committed warrior.  I fight battles continually, and even though they are in my mind, even thought nothing external is going on, they FEEL the same as real battles.

I share this, because I know I'm not the only one.

And later in the night, I was surrounded by zombie children in a library, in a dream.  I told them: I don't fear you, you need to fear ME.

And I look at my own history.  Everything in my past worked to destroy my core sense of self, but I survived.  Everyone in my family is crazy, but they told me I was crazy.  I persisted.

All my life, I have seen things a bit--sometimes a lot--differently.  This is because I am not afraid to pay the cost of being different.  I am not afraid of mockery, or personal attack.  I do not fear for the sense of reality and sound thought I have fought so hard and long to attain.

I have created myself, at great cost of effort and pain.  I have created a world view, a philosophy, a path to a better future.  I have offered solutions to all the problems confronting human kind, and I have been able to do so because on some level I do not fear the dark. I am the one who lives in the dark, and points the way to the light.

The terror impulse must weaken over time.  I can look it in the eye, and know from long experience that I can take what it deals out. I am getting stronger by the day.

At some point, I will become truly interesting.

Sunday, February 19, 2017

The Education Secretary

I wonder if 1 in 100 of the people doing what they are told, and chanting slogans against Betsy DeVos, know who Obama's Secretary of Education was?  I don't, and I'm a political wonk.  There may well have been more than one.

But as I ponder the graph here, it seems to me this could be drawn another way: dollars spent per unit of educational outcome.  Logically, if there were a relation between dollars spent and outcome, then it would show up in such a graph.

What this graph REALLY shows is that the amount of actual education achieved for dollar spent has been DECREASING, somewhat precipitously.  Our educational Return on Investment has been in steady decline for decades.

How could Betsy DeVos possibly do worse than quadrupling spending and achieving NOTHING?  Science scores actually went DOWN.

I was pondering today the large buildings all large school districts have, filled with people making six figure incomes who never teach students at all.  What if we got rid of all the administrators, or most of them, and took the saved money to pay our teachers $150,000/year, provided they de-unionized, allowed vouchers and school choice, and were willing to be audited periodically?  Would we not attract and keep much better talent?  We need much less governing, and much more doing.  Bureaucracies are cancers, whose nature is to grow and grow and grow, and snuff the life out of everything surrounding them.

I was wondering too if we could require all teachers to be videotaped.  My youngest was telling me that one of the teachers there regularly goes off on hour long rants about nothing.  They will schedule a quiz, and a class discussion, and then she will just go off on a personal tangent and never come back.

I am uncomfortable with the idea of students controlling teacher's fates--because that could easily become a tool of intimidation--but if students could complain, and then point to a video of a teacher being stupid, progress would be possible; again, if the teachers unions can be broken.

No matter what Trump does there will be screaming.  It's hard to believe, though, that it has any chance of working the way it used to in the past.  As one meme floating around has it, Trump could cure cancer, and then be accused of denying the Grim Reaper his due.  The American people--over half, at any rate--see this for what it is: mean spirited, anti-American, intentionally destructive, and filled with lies and blind hate.

The last post

I was drinking, of course,

But I seem to have discovered that despite all my years of dissociation, that I did feel things when they happened, and I can access them now in memory.

At some point, with my history, you do wonder where your life has been.  I have spent so many years just trying to get through the day, just trying to function as a human being.

And I am realizing is that strength is for special occasions.  It should not be needed continually.  Once I get myself calm, I will have very powerful resources I can put to better use.

Saturday, February 18, 2017


Some nights, I feel I have somehow swum into the middle of the dominant stream of American or even Western cultural life.  I will spend hours "dreaming", which is really catching and feeling the feelings of an immense river flowing over and through me.  I do it while sleeping, but it is intense sometimes.

Last night, I kept doing tours of the top of a skyscraper, which had amusement parks, gardens, and everything needed for human life on it.  Except for actual nature, and something other than plastic.

And I looked at my world today, and felt I am plastic, myself.  It's interesting.  I took a class on burial rituals around the world in graduate school, and rural Greeks, as of the mid-90's or so, still buried then dug up their deceased loved ones and placed their bones in an ossuary.  They were finding it tough, then, though, because modern plastics we unthinkingly imbibe delay or even inhibit the natural decay process.

Who knows how much plastic is in me?  But plastic is where I seemingly need to live.  So many of us live there.

Where is this world leading?  Well, you, I, and chance have some say don't we?

I thought I had more to say.  It's been a long day, and I am tired all over.

I am healing, slowly.  I will say that.  I was looking around my space tonight, and I feel I have put my feet in life, often.  Sometimes those experiences freeze up, too.  Sometimes. the risks I took, and the feelings that opened up, freeze up.  I see this.  But I have the key.  The keys.

My place has pictures all over it, and every one has a story.  I could do a two hour tour of the small place where I live. Meaning is everywhere.  My purpose, the strong passions that drive me, is everywhere.

Often, I am silent when I am real.  Oh, but what flows through me!!!  I am oceans.  This is life.  This is life.

What else is on display

The cowardice and complicity of Republican leadership.  They have been pretending for years that it was only Democrat opposition that prevented them from doing X, Y, and Z.  Let us say, passing a budget.  Better yet, a balanced budget.

But whatever merits Paul Ryan may once have had seem to have vanished when he took power.  He is currently third in line to the Presidency.  I remember him coming off as an honest policy wonk, the guy with a plan, the guy who could balance the budget and prevent fiscal ruin.  Where is that guy now?

So, in total, what stands exposed under the Klieg lights Trump brought to Washington is a SYSTEM which makes continuous excuses, but which has run out of excuses.  There is nothing left but the pathetic truths of complicity in crime, apathy, cynical grandstanding with no sincerity, and covert sympathy for the indefensible positions of the Democrats.


I have made this a sort of running joke.  The complicit media continues to fail to grasp the implications of the fact they did their VERY BEST to ensure Trump did not get elected, but that he still got elected.  This means that their VERY BEST, now, is unlikely to achieve any other result.  They make mountains of mole-hills.  They lie when the story isn't good enough, and when there isn't a story that makes Trump look bad, they simply make it up out of whole cloth.  They are skilled tailors.

But the American people get this.  They have demonstrated it time and time again, and most importantly on November 8th, when the media had Hillary a virtually lock on winning the Presidency.  If I am reading the polling data right, the whole manufactured Flynn controversy--which as I have argued should actually HELP Trump in the long run--seems to have caused Trump's numbers to go UP, not down.

The media has had American politicians on a leash for such a long time, they don't know what to do when somebody just ignores them.  They can't argue the facts, and like long term addicts, they can't break away from the habit of lying.

Thus, when I say 'IT'S TRUMPS WORST WEEK EVER.  AGAIN!!!"   I am mocking them, and their dishonest and dishonorable efforts to prevent honest and genuinely useful policy from being implemented to help actual Americans, and to defend common sense and common decency.

Friday, February 17, 2017

Civil Service

They say armchair generals discuss strategy, whereas the professionals discuss logistics.

Here is a logistical question I do not know the answer to: how easily can Trump fire career "civil servants", particularly if they are blatantly insubordinate?  Are we so insane as a nation that we have made it hard to fire people who not only do not want to do their jobs, but want to sabotage the initiatives of the person they supposedly work for?

I read in a left wing meme that Republicans had passed something that allowed individual employees of the government to have their pay cut to nothing, or effectively nothing, as part of bigger spending bills.  I don't know if this is true, but that would be great.

And Republicans control Congress: why not pass a law making it easier to fire assholes who are torpedoing and betraying the work of the elected President?  These mother fuckers exist at the tax payer expense, and if they don't want to do their jobs for any reason, then they need to sign non-disclosure, be forbidden from lobbying for five years, and get booted out the door.

I pondered the "politicization" of the bureaucracy governing our nation.  Here is what I concluded: the President is elected to enact an agenda which is INHERENTLY political.  He is elected to put into place his ideas, and it is the job of the bureaucracy--I keep wanting to use a word I believe Keynes invented, the Commisariat--to enact that agenda.

The President is CEO of America, Inc.  His job is to deliver good things and avoid bad things, to the extent those things properly fall under his scope of responsibilities, and in this his job is no different than the job of any other CEO.  And in any other context, insubordination and sabotage would be grounds for immediate dismissal, no questions asked.  It doesn't matter in any company, and should not matter in our government, if the people involved agree with the policies.  I'm quite sure people who despised Obama nonetheless did their jobs.

But of course it is quite obvious that the people who work for government overwhelmingly favor MORE government, and only one party has been consistent in calling for that, even if both parties have effectively supported it.  I would hazard a guess that AT LEAST 80% of career bureaucrats are Democrats, many of them ardently so.

When I think of decimation, I think of the scene--one actually enacted in history, as I read the book, too, and know this happened--where Mel Gibson, as Lt. Col Hal Moore (who just passed away in the last week or so) in "We were Soldiers Once and Young", tells his troops to find anything that looks suspicious, and fire 3 rounds at it on his mark.  When they do, they realize that heavily camouflaged NVA had been sneaking up on them all night long.  It turns immediately into a major firefight.

It is almost certainly the case that more than 10% of Federal employees plan to oppose Trumps agenda--which is to say the agenda the American people called for enacting when asked in the polling booths--but firing 10% would allow us to get rid of most of the most vocal, the leaders, the Never Trump'ers; and as I have said, the 10% reduction is AFTER the clearly guilty are identified and prosecuted or fired.

Everything would be much, much easier if we had either elected Hillary, or elected a John Kasich, so that we could continue to conceal the lie that much of our government betrays the true interests of most Americans on a daily basis and has for many decades.  The creep would have continued, and with no national leader with a podium to speak obvious and important truths, and full price of these lies would have continued to inch closer to fruition.

Trump is the first President in modern times with a clear mandate to reverse the Leftist erosion of our liberties, of common sense, of coherent morality, and of our nation itself.  All of those who have been working in the shadows are now exposed, and as I said, it is ugly.  Fucking ugly.  But Trump did not invent it.  He did not cause it.  He is simply the one with the balls and the mandate and the tools to fight it.

Trump's "anti gay sentiments"

One of the odder features of the current hysteria is that as far as I know, there is NOTHING, anywhere in the public record, anywhere in anything he said on the campaign trail, that indicates an anti-gay sentiment.

The "logic" seems to go something like "if Trump opposes illegal immigration, he opposes legal immigration.  If he opposes legal immigration he is a racist, and all racists also hate gay people."  As fucking imbecilic as that sounds, I LITERALLY--and I literally mean literally here, no exaggeration, I am not fucking with you in the slightest--think that is what these people believe.

You ask them: where did Trump say anti-gay stuff?  The exact words may vary, but they will never contain specific language said on a specific date.

And I wonder how many remember his first run for President on the Reform Party ticket?  He was asked about gays then, and he said if they are the best match for the job, they are hired, period, no other questions.  asked.  He doesn't care.  It's not something remotely on his radar.  COMPETENCE is on his radar.

And it literally seems like there is flow chart, in which any attack on any designated "minority" or "oppressed (in the sense Oprah Winfrey and Michelle Obama are oppressed) is considered an attack on everybody but white people.  Because it is an attack on everybody but white people, it constitutes "white supremacy".  And the solution to "white supremacy" is yelling.  If the first round of yelling and name calling doesn't work, escalate the tone. Yell louder.  Yell more.  Ratchet up the rhetoric so the "white supremacists" become KKK members, then Grand Dragons, then Hitler Lite, then Hitler, then worse than Hitler.  Then their heads explode, and we don't hear from them any more.  But many heads remain regrettably unexploded, so we are still dealing with the Hitler meme, all of which began with mild disagreement with current immigration policies.

No sane, intelligent person can but view these hysterics with anything but contempt.  It is far, far, far, far, beneath the dignity of ANYONE who claims even a rudiment of common sense, erudition, and capacity for measure taking and sound judgment. It is quite literally a mass eruption of grotesque mental illness.

I was thinking today, though, that all this was already below the surface, and it is very, very good that it is being exposed to light now, because it has masqueraded as decency and humanitarianism for far too long.

The fangs are out.  It is ugly, and a little bit scary, but it is OBVIOUS for all to see.  And as I keep saying, even though the media makes it look like there is consensus, the lunatics, in my best estimate, cannot be more than perhaps 10% of the population, and they cannot but be driving people away from them in droves, as people of genuine good will see the vampires, werewolves, and ghouls lurking underneath the assumed angel wings, and priestly gowns.  It has all been a lie, and now it is unmasked as an OBVIOUS lie.  There is no goodness there.   There is no love of humanity, or a pursuit of better ideas.  It is the abode of the demonic, and always has been.

Demons hide many places, but they particularly prefer the dark, and darkness, in turn, loves lies.  Truth, then is both the best offense and the best defense, and we are blessed with a man running this country who tells the truth.

Thursday, February 16, 2017


If you are an old warrior, you have never fought your last battle until you find the Way.

Unless you can die and be reborn regularly, you are forced to view the world as fixed lines, with tired and old eyes.

The Flynn Assassination

Whenever something "bad" happens, it is always useful to look for any positive aspects of it.

What did this Flynn episode make obvious?  1) that our intelligence agencies do not believe they have to operate by the rules which govern the rest of us; 2) that they are ready and willing to interfere, illegally, in domestic politics in precisely the manner they accuse the Russians of; 3) that Trump threatens their agenda, which means they HAVE an agenda, other than that of supporting the elected representative of the American people, and following his lawful directives; and 4) that the directive granting the NSA broader powers can be reversed by Trump, who is the President now.

I see no difference between Flynn, in his preparations to take office, talking with the Russians about future policy--particularly given the daily and venomous attacks on them which the complicit media was directing--and Obama telling Putin to his face "after the election I will have more flexibility."  The election had not even been held at that point, actually, making this worse.  Obama could not know for sure he would be President.  Flynn KNEW Trump had won.

This whole thing, obviously, is a manufactured tempest in a teacup.  It is TRUMPS WORST WEEK EVER, for the 56th time.  The American people see what is going on, and it pisses us off.  TRUMP IS THE PRESIDENT.  Stop fucking with him daily.

The bonus here, is Trump can draw a line and just say NO MORE ALBERTO GONZALEZ'S.  He can say, look, you attack my people, expect retribution.  Media outlets that run continual propaganda attacks on him can be disinvited from press conferences.

And more importantly, Trump has the political cover he needs, now, in my view, to do a MAJOR house-cleaning among our intelligence service, who seemingly recognize as master neither the law nor their elected boss.  That has to change.

And, again, Trump has what neither Nixon nor Reagan had, which is not just a Republican Congress, but a wave of resurgent support for conservatism generally. Obviously, Paul Ryan is a pussy or part of the swamp, but the movement is in the direction of these assholes needing to watch their backs, or they will get voted out of office.  Americans see what the Left has done, and we are having none of it.  Trump can and should browbeat these people into doing the fucking jobs they were elected to do.

Now, obviously not every battle is worth "going nuclear" over, but clearly in the case of the intelligence community, they drew first blood, which justifies every counter-measure Trump undertakes.

That is the silver lining here.  Sometimes you need your enemies to attack you first, so you can justify the response.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Nixon and Trump

I will remind any readers I may have, that Nixon formed "the Plumbers" to find and stop leaks, which were, if memory serves, among other things sabotaging his efforts to negotiate an end to the Vietnam War.  Watergate was an unauthorized operation, conducted by men who were nonetheless connected to Nixon.

But those times and these are very different.  Nixon had to face a Democrat run Congress.  He was facing continual protests over the Vietnam War.  And even though there were many silent conservatives, there was no honest conservative media.  Everyone was against Nixon, against the war, and eager to crucify him any way they could.

Now, obviously Trump faces that same sort of animus, but the American people have lost faith in our media.  They just put him in office in a defiant "fuck you" to CNN, the New York Times, ABC, NBC, CBS and all the rest.  We have his back.  We gave him a Republican Congress, and gave Republicans a clear majority of the governorships and legislatures.

Conservatism--true Liberalism--is rising.  It is ascendant.  FDR's Democrats are dead, and everyone knows it.  The street thugs attacking Trump supporters cannot claim to stand for anything.  Despite all the noise and shouting, good ideas are surging forth everywhere and cannot be suppressed forever.

Trump has some huge battles to fight, but he has the tools and the support he needs to win them.

Who watches the watchers?

What do you do when the people with the most information, the most ability to wield covert influence, and the most to lose from transparency are working against you?

I would say a purge.  Trump is the CEO of American Government, Inc., and he can fire as many people as he wants.  I would start building background papers on everybody even close to the leaks, start prosecuting people, and start firing people he just doesn't trust.

This is a serious game.  By explicity intention of the law, the CIA is not allowed to work in the United States, but when the Director is weighing in on domestic political matters, he IS working in the United States.  And that is not counting people down the line simply calling up reporters and leaking anything and everything embarrassing they can find, regardless of its effect on national security.

The Romans punished disloyalty and cowardice by decimations.  At times entire legions were ended and folded into other legions without those scars of defeat, cowardice, and treason.

Whatever is done, I think it needs to be big, or he dies of a thousand small cuts.

And ponder, too, the loyalties of those who would oppose a man like Trump.  He is not wanting anything more or less than a safe nation, a healthy economy, freedom for all, and a fair shake for all.  Who opposes an agenda like that?  Could anyone who genuinely loves this country oppose that agenda?  Yes, I get that the media portrays him as Hitler, but these people are not that stupid.  That is epic stupid.

No: these people have likely been sabotaging American interests in the pursuit of global government for decades now.  As I keep pointing out, the CIA DIRECTOR was a Communist in the immediate aftermath of the Vietnam War, after the North broke every treaty is signed, invaded the South, and began a campaign of mass murder, forced collectivization, psychological torture camps, and property confiscation.

If he could be a Communist then, what would have changed since then?  And if he kept getting promoted, can we not assume that many more thought like him?

Maybe we need to end the CIA.  Eradicate it.  Expand the DIA, or form something new from scratch.

The Ballad of Alberto Gonzalez, Redux

The vibe the media has chosen to take reminds me of this Tom Waits poem "What's he building in there":

Everything is sinister.  Didn't you just KNOW that Alberto Gonzalez was covering up something SINISTER?  That's why he had to resign, for firing people who were always fired, but in a peculiarly sinister way.  He was UP TO SOMETHING.  What was he firing them for?  What did he have to hide?


And of course, there is a checklist.  First he is sinister, then she is sinister, then we are sinister, then they are sinister.  Pure evil as far as the eye can see, secrets galore, terrors and betrayals, secret treasons and dark alliances.


But you know, Donald Trump had NO CHANCE at winning the White House either.  I think the solution is 60 Republicans in the Senate.  It's doable, on the path we are on.  The media has become farce.  Flynn was innocent of all but perhaps a formality.

And in all seriousness, Trump does have a major problem on his hands, in that in our intelligence community, and with the FBI, he is dealing with some very smart people who are practiced at deception, covert operations, and political sabotage.  One idea, an odd one even for me, is employing some trustworthy psychics to figure out who the real players are, and what their agenda is.  That's almost what will be needed, although Trump is certainly no dummy, and certainly  not helpless when it comes to canning and prosecuting people.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Counter intelligence

Trump, effectively, has a den of spies working against him, at all levels of his Administration.  He needs to find people he can trust, put them in key positions, and start firing, demoting, and jailing people who are actively conspiring against him.

I proposed in the past, and will propose again, a reinstitution of the Roman practice of decimation. Take the IRS.  It is an active political organ still working for the Democrats.  Trump needs to arrest and put on trial and jail everyone who broke the law, fire everyone remotely close to political activity, then fire every tenth person from top to bottom.  They will remember that.

Many agencies--the EPA is another, and perhaps even the CIA (ATF and DEA I think we should eliminate: the list of agencies needing a kick in the balls is long)--need this sort of treatment.  Call it a purge if you want, but we cannot run a government where a sizable number of the people whose salaries we the American people are paying, and who are supposed to work FOR US, and who WE ELECT, refuse to do so.

Why it matters if China owns our movie theaters  Quite obviously, they can choose not to show this movie, or any in the future which tell the truth about their horrific system.

Mao had his own version of this.  And his version was actually a bit worse, in that he was too fucking stupid to believe that tens of millions of people were dying, and because much of it was the result of his ignorant meddling, based on pseudo-scientific bullshit, in practices which had worked for thousands of years. He kept accusing the farmers of hiding grain under their houses.  But no, they were eating their neighbors children, and their neighbors were eating theirs.

The true story of Communism is much more disgusting, much more stomach turning, than the worst of the Nazi atrocities.  The Nazis killed people on purpose, because they loathed them. The Communists killed people out of their own psychopathic need.  And they kill people to this very day for the crime of not believing that their poverty, unfreedom and misery is anything but a utopian dream.

Put another way, within their own paradigm, the Nazis were rational. Their "science" taught them that Jews were inferior and that Germans were meant to rule the world.  Everything they did served this purpose.

Communists, in contrast, talk continually about justice, and peace, and progress and prosperity, all while destroying any hope of any of them.  They are lunatics, without any saving graces.

Nazism, at least, would have worked for the Germans, and those they saw as kin. Communism kills without hesitation, reservation, or scruple EVERYTHING in its path, all while declaiming its virtues to tortured souls forced to endure a world of continual lies.  It is the purest form of evil extant on this planet.

It is literally like 2/3rd's of the academics, at least in the Humanities, are preaching a more or less pure form of Satanism.

I would add as well that the Nazis recognized early on the propaganda power of film, as did the Soviets.  Anyone in a position to influence our films is in a position to influence our culture.

And self evidently, the deluded lunatics in Hollywood are only too happy to help them in their global war on common sense standards of decency, on the Golden Rule, and on the very possibility of sanity.  Darkness is their vision.  That is why they call Trump "dark": because he offers the possibility of light, and this they cannot stand, and as always, they accuse their enemies of their own vices and own intentions.

Racial Progress

I think the turning point will be when blacks en masse realize that they don't need white people, but that white people--Leftists, to be specific--need them.  Seriously, how much GOOD do kowtowing, confused, emotionally retarded white people do apologizing for their "privilege"?  I can see how it might be a bit of an emotional kick for black people at white universities, but does it create jobs?  Foster better parenting?  Create enthusiasm for learning?

It is a ritual order, and something in the nature of a bad religion, where the priests and priestesses are determined by birth, and people who could contribute something actually useful consigned to yearning for their own enslavement.  It's all ludicrous.


I was writing a message to someone else and something came out I thought I might share:

Parenting is a long series of guesses, where close enough usually counts.

Monday, February 13, 2017


I get the image in my mind of the children of the Left seeing making demands as somehow a validation of their importance.  They have gotten used to having the latest idea come down the pike, shouting and screaming and name calling and mouth frothing at everyone who "opposes" it by not immediately supporting it, and getting submission from Republicans and moderate Democrats.  In this are very much like the children who are used to throwing fits to get their way, and who are indulged in their fits by overly generous and codependent mothers.

What is happening is that Trump--and the mass of American people--are not listening.  Within their logic, if screaming and shouting and rolling around on the floor and holding their breath worked in the past, then MORE of the same is what is needed to return to good old days, the status quo ante.

That is all this street demonstration stuff is.

And when I say children, I mean that even the grey haired old hippies who are showing up have failed in the basic task of social maturation, and for a very simple reason: maturity involves accepting the responsibility of playing a role in a larger order, and these people reject that larger order.  They reject the need for adulthood.  They reject the need for personal responsibility.  They reject the things the rest of us hold sacred, and they have nothing firm to replace them with.

Now, I was pondering today the consequences of growing up watching TV commercials, of watching fake people act excited about things they were paid to act excited about.  Every day, you have mediocre schooling, taught by people who are not proud of our culture, and you come home to some form of falseness.  Perhaps you watch TV, perhaps you play video games, perhaps you watch movies: where in any of this is there gravitas, the sacred, something which MATTERS?

It is a real need--the need for struggle and difficulty and sacrifice--which is met poorly by the constant shouting and pouting.

I have spent some years trying to envision a beyond, a future culture which meets our needs, and which is not a slave culture of the sort the globalists have been working to create.  This should properly, I will suggest, be the task of all honest humanitarians and humanists.  It should be the task of genuine Liberals, men and women of honest good will, and those who feel compassion for the many suffering people on this Earth.

This is great

How did the Left become mentally unhinged and emotionally out of control?  Still operating Soviet propaganda.  Ideas do not die when regimes do.  They die when they are examined carefully by reasonable, honest, well meaning people who care about the outcomes flowing from their words and actions.

Most academics are utterly unwilling to take responsibility for their actions; rather, for the consequences of actions based upon their words.  They are dishonest, treasonous, and irrational.

Clear vision begins all honest and useful revolutions, and a revolution, a new beginning, a renaissance of truly Liberal thought, is what is needed.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Cultural scapegoating

One of the lesser commented on but ubiquitous features of histoical fascisms of both the communistic  and nationalistic varieties is blaming some group for all the problems of the nation. Hitlet blamed Jews, bankers and Bolsheviks. Mussolini blamed socialists as well. The Soviets blamed fascists, kulaks, the bourgeoisie and more others than I can count, including dissidents in their own parties. They had a lot of hate.

The concept of "white privilege" needs to be seen through this filter. Not only does the Left have street gangs at work to try and intimidate people they don't like, but also have a scapegoat. It is an odd scene, whites blaming whites, but they get excused through self loathing and a willingness to wear hair shirts.

Water protectors

As I think about it, water is very mythic.  It stands for feeling, for purity, and even in some respects for infinity, as in "oceanic" feelings.

But how many pipelines are there in the United States that go under river beds?  Near water sources?  Near lakes and streams?  I can't honestly say, but I know the number is a lot.

Consider how ludicrous it would be for a suburban kid from Seattle to try and block a pipeline in Louisiana  because the water it was crossing is "sacred".  White people don't get to call the Earth sacred, at least not without copying and plagiarizing Native Americans.  Yes, I get the Eucharist may not be thrilling, but it is what we have.  We have our country, and we have our ideals. We are admittedly a myth-challenged nation and we are the worse for it.

This whole protest is in no small measure a means for people who feel they lack a sense of connection to wonder, the universe, the Earth, and even to God, to get that feeling.  The importance they are attaching to it is vastly out of proportion to its ACTUAL importance.

Again: nothing much was going to get done in the middle of a North Dakota winter anyway.  Obama did the politically convenient thing, knowing if Trump won it would be reversed, so that even though the project started and blossomed under his Administration, even though it got within a mile or two, if memory serves, of its destination after a long building process, that he would not be blamed for it.

And I will note that the new water treatment plant was paid for out of the "Stimulus" money.  It is economically useless, but it should have made these people shut up.

I really think David Archambeault--I think that is close to the correct name--or whatever the tribal leaders name is, should tell the protesters to leave.

I will add that there is this underlying sense of the sacred within much of the environmental movement.  Now, I have nothing against clean air and water, and nothing to say in support of pollution and ecological poison.  But it seems to me that as with this case, much, much too often feeling gets the upper hand over science, because people have this emotionally rooted need to believe.  Global Warming is an excellent example.  It is anti-scientific bullshit, but it meets both the emotional needs of people who need something to protect, and the political needs of those who never saw an expansion of government they didn't like.

Standing Rock

I have not followed this thing closely, so what follows may not be all that clever, but fuck it.

As Jonathan Haidt posits in his Moral Foundations Theory,  moralities the world over seem to be built from 6 basic building blocks, the essentials of which we are born with: Care, Fairness, Liberty, Loyalty, Authority, and Sanctity.

As I have pointed out repeatedly, Leftism claims to care about Care and Fairness primarily.  What is missing is a sense of the sacred, and a sense of loyalty to that sense (rather than to specific people and causes).  There is for them, as one obvious example, nothing sacred about the flag or America, or even democracy and freedom.  They will use these words sometimes, but they don't mean them, or even in my view understand them.

What seems to have happened in Standing Rock is that the Federal government and the people behind the pipeline solicited questions and concerns for several years, and never heard word one from the Standing Rock Sioux until the pipeline was more or less at their front door.  The pipeline had been rerouted multiple times based on feedback from other tribes, or concerns about undiscovered graveyards and the like.

Additionally, as all the Standing Rock Sioux know, the water intake they currently use to provide water for their reservation will soon be decommissioned and a newer one 7 miles downriver from the pipeline installed.  What they also know is that the pipeline is being built in clay 92 feet below the river bad, which is considerably more distance than is required, and than is normally done.  So both the risk of a leak, and the risk to their water in the event of a leak, have been meliorated.

What seems to me to have happened is that the tribal chief got the bright idea of shaking down the oil company, by staging protests they knew would draw national attention (no doubt they called the reporters to make sure), then more or less asking for protection money to keep the pipeline rolling.  But the pipeline people didn't give in.  What instead happened is hippies started showing up en masse.  From second hand reports I read, the chief has wanted them gone for some time.  They are a bit embarrassing, and likely making life around there much less peaceful.  But he can't tell them to leave.  They came to support him and his tribe.  So he is kind of stuck.

Now it was obvious to me that Obama ordered the Army Corps of Engineers to do whatever they did to stop construction--the Commander in Chief is after all in charge of the Army, of which the Corps is a part--and that Trump would start things back up, which he will.

But here is the point I wanted to make: it is not OK to be a proud white person in this country among leftists.  It is not OK to hold your religious beliefs as sacred and untouchable.  It is not OK to love this country, warts and all, and view patriotic effort as a sacred duty.

It IS OK, however, and even extolled, that one feel guilt for crimes you didn't commit, which your parents didn't commit, which no one in the entire history of your family committed, and with which you have no connection other than the fact of your birth in a political entity called the United States.  It is also OK to support others--literally anyone else but white people--in their own sacred sense of their own place and people.  It is also OK to feel more loyalty to THEM than to your own people.

So what seems to have happened is that mythic nerve was inadvertently struck, and hordes of aimless, lost, confused white kids are showing up to protect people who do not really need protecting, and who really don't even want to be "protected", but who don't know how to end the party.

Some of these kids are so emotionally involved that they will spend years in jail, for real crimes, for nothing.  The pipeline will be built.  There won't be any spills, and even if there are, it is a manageable problem.

It is very important to know who you are and what you believe.  And it is very important to develop an internalized sense of self worth, such that you can differentiate between people who really need you, those who are using you, and those you are both using and being used by as fellow codependents.

Old wounds

They say some wounds never heal, and this is likely true for most of us, but it hit me today that their texture does change, and that they are best viewed as a thousand mosaic squares--some of them black, and which will always stay black--but some of which are colored and interesting.  Scars--and I have more than my share--are not just indicative of pain, but of learning, of deepened experience, of potential wisdom.

Two thousand years later, Jews still mourn at the Wailing Wall.  The loss still stings.  But the question can and should be asked: who would they have been if that had never happened?  Not who they are, certainly.  It what ways did Jewish culture evolve for the better?  There is no more animal sacrifice.  That to me is good.   And they are a race of geniuses, having a share in something like a third or more of all Nobel Prizes, despite being considerably less than 1% of the worlds population.

I was contemplating my belly the other day--that is the word, regrettably--and I was suddenly aware that it had a thousand little communities, a thousand different, differentiable, places, contacts, textures, colors.  This image is where I pulled that visual from the first paragraph from.  I realized that far from being monolithic, all parts of me partake in this sensation of being composed of many small pieces.

For their part, the Buddhists break space, time, and self into small pieces as well.  Everything is both discontinuous and connected, depending on your perspective.  But so often you have to push things to one pole to see the other on a spectrum, or to see the spectrum at all.

Odd random thought

It is odd to recollect that modern day Turkey--or most of it--was for some 1,000 years a place where Greek was spoken.  So was Syria.  I knew this, but have never really thought about it.

Follow up

As I think about it, this notion of deriving pleasure from making people happy explains a lot of Trumps behavior.  He loves doing guest bits on soap operas and WWF, because they make people laugh and smile. They are entertaining.  And the whole deal with The Apprentice was making an engaging show which people enjoyed watching.  With, in other words, making people happy.

Trump, unlike most Leftists, has never considered himself a saint, a messiah, or even a positive influence in anything but business.  He is what he is.  He says what he thinks, and always has.  Part of that is the New Yorker in him, and much of it is simply how he's put together.  He has healthy self esteem, doesn't feel the need to apologize for who he is (although I think he likely does laugh and smile sometimes at some the things thrown at him he knows are true), and these are all good traits.

What I DON'T think is really a big motivating factor for him is a need to always be the center of attention. Yes, his towers have his name on them.  Yes, he has enjoyed the limelight for decades.  But I think he sees himself as part of a bigger show, one with many more personalities he is happy to welcome onto the stage.

He is not a narcissist in my opinion.  He thinks about other people a lot.  He is unquestionably at times selfish, especially in his infidelities, but he is capable of recognizing the many individual worlds he shares this planet with.

He differs in this, in my view, from Barack Obama, who was some combination of convinced by others and by himself that he was unique, wonderful, and a gift to humanity, despite patent intellectual mediocrity, muted passion, an unserious attitude, and an aversion to hard work.

Trump dream

I have had dreams of the last 3 Presidents, and had one of Trump last night.  I have written about them, and will not again here. I do feel I am powerfully psychic, potentially.  I am about a 75% believer in astrology, even though I admit I have no idea how it may work, and 7 of my ten planets are in water signs, including both Sun and Moon.  I also have a water trine.  Lots of feeling.  Lots of perception.  But those abilities are kind of on hold.  If I can't manage my own emotional world, how the fuck could I manage an assault of the worlds of those around me?  That will all need to remain mostly latent for a long time, and perhaps never be fully expressed in this life.  I would view that in any event as more a curse than a blessing.

Be that as it may, what I saw was a man who dedicated his life to showing people a good time, who is at his happiest watching over a landscape of people eating great food, drinking great booze, in a beautiful setting, laughing and having a good time.  This is the outcome he loves.  He is married to his work, and that is the only marriage he has ever truly recognized.  He needs a woman--a beautiful woman--at the end of the day to help him wind down, but he is an extremely driven, extremely passionate man.

For her part--and I have never seen the wife before--I think Melania is often lonely.  After his fashion he does love her, but his work is his true love, and if she does stay in New York, it will be because she may as well, for all the time she will spend with him.  I think that tape may have hurt her too.  He may have already been married to her when that discussion happened.  Certainly, she must wonder what has changed.

Trump is obviously no angel.  He is a hard driving man, but in his own way he is an archetype of the self made man.  This is an American archetype, the tycoon.

In effect, what Trump is trying to do is take this sense that everybody should be happy and having a good time and apply it to practical politics, and apply it nationally.  We should all welcome this with open arms.  It is good.  It is a good passion to have in the White House.

I am trying to lay off politics a bit, but can't resist a couple more comments.

First, though, on politics: what it occurs to me is that political obsessions are the perfect deflection mechanism.  There is ALWAYS something to be mad about, something to be passionate about, something to take your focus away from inner core dynamics and push them to the periphery, and instead focus on something always changing, always evolving, and which can and does continually provoke emotions.  Politics in this sense is much like sports.  And as far as that goes, our political opinions matter, practically, about as much as our sports opinions, which obviously is to say not at all.

Obamacare: what SHOULD have been done originally is obvious.  Rand Paul has sketched out a path to middle class freedom from the tyranny of bad policy.  It is all simple.  But by design Obamacare also created a complex system of rewards for voting Democrat.  Subsides were handed out, Medicaid expanded.  It seems to me that the most politically effective way of ending Obamacare without creating a massive rallying cry for the Democrats, is to figure out either a path to migrate the people who did benefit from Obamacare to something at least decent and defensible; or to simply grant this money to the budget and find cuts elsewhere.  That process could take some time.  It is highly detailed and complex, as all large intrusions of government are.  I am perhaps making excuses, but if there is a delay, my HOPE is that this is the reason.

Neil Gorsuch: I read he was privately defending what we might call the Thin Black Line, from Trump's warranted comments on judicial activism.  He is quite right, of course, that the judiciary should not be politicized.  But I wonder about his intelligence in apparently not grasping that it IS politicized.  As Thomas Sowell apparently said in 2003 "One of these days the 9th Circuit is going to rule the Constitution unConstitutional", and the specific ruling which proceeded it was no better.

The actual law is very clear.  There is no ambiguity.  Foreigners are not protected by our Constitution, and Federal law grants the President very broad discretion in deciding who he is going to let in.  All forms of discrimination--of discriminating one sort of person from another, of making or perceiving a difference--are allowed.  We all must grant that in complex situations sometimes it is necessary to treat people as groups, in the manner the Left does ubiquitously and daily, albeit in their case to uniformly affirm the absolute virtue of anyone who is not one of us, and the uniform and absolute corruption of all white people.  Nothing racist there, obviously.

And the Supreme Court, where Gorsuch may land, is blatantly politicized as well, and has been at least since the time of FDR.  The Four Horsemen stood their ground for a time, but the tide was too great.

We can applaud the sentiment, but again I wonder about the wisdom of someone protecting a boat which sailed long ago.

As far as Trump, he faces a gale force wind.  I was in Wally World yesterday and every single magazine and tabloid at the check out lanes had something in exclamation points, and in general negative about Trump or his daughter and her husband.

I said the fighting would be house to house, room to room, and I hoped I would be wrong.  I was not wrong.

But Trump has the passion, the courage, and the habit of determination that should get us all through this period, get much useful work done, and hopefully at some point a grand national party to celebrate.

Thursday, February 9, 2017

Follow up

I've been pondering who the alcoholics are in my last post.  Blacks, obviously, since the Left--which consists in large measure in white kids (and the "adults" they become biologically) who grew up in comfortable homes and relative affluence--presumes to speak for them, but never does anything which actually HELPS them.  And for their part, many blacks continue to vote Democrat, in a never ending acquiescence to being hustled again and again.

But more generally, the people codependent people logically flock to are those who they can claim most need them, who are most marginalized.  As I was reading today, Muslims seem to be the new in-group, despite the fact that Muslims themselves are racist, xenophobic, anti-Semitic, misogynistic, and like to kill gays.  This doesn't matter.  A grand cause has been found, a mass movement, someone NEEDS US, the Left cries.

All of this is grotesquely pathological and psychologically unhealthy.  To call it unprincipled would be too generous, since the very concept of a consistently applied principle other than Us/Them eroded decades ago.

Basically the Left as it is evolving consists in fuck ups, people who are not American, people who hate us, and dysfunctional, mainly white, people whose sole source of meaning in life comes from knowing there are people out there they can "stand up for", even if those people are bad people, and even if they don't actually need that "help".

Ponder this analogy. I  think it has a lot of psychological merit, and explains a lot.

And consider too that the politics that flow from this mindset are purely emotionally driven, and have NOTHING to do with improving any human life, lightening any real burden, with genuine tolerance or compassion, and that the whole thing is dripping with self loathing and following hatred of everyone else and the world.

Leftism as a giant alcoholic family

When we speak of codependence, we usually speak of an unhealthy relationship based on unspoken lies, in which one unhealthy person gets their needs met by caring for someone else who cannot or will not take responsibility for their actions. The benefit to, say, the drunk father, being cared for by his daughter or wife, is obvious.  But what is the benefit to the care-giver?

One, they get a simple morality.  Their job is to care for this person, and they become virtuous in doing it.  Two, they are able to marginalize their own lack of emotional development through constant attention to the other.  They don't have to be authentic because they are needed.  Three, they get to feel superior to the person they are caring for.  This is not hard, but this silent condescension is I think an important aspect of it.  They are handed self esteem on a plate.  These are on the plus side of the balance sheet.

But they are trapped on the other.  Outside of this relationship, they are helpless and alone.  They have a world of inner turmoil that has been at a slow boil all their lives.  They have to live in a complex moral world where the right decisions are often not obvious, and integrity demands considerable perceptual work be done to even approximate a diligent goodness.  And the world doesn't care about them at all.

Obviously, these sorts of unhealthy relationships do not develop overnight.  Mild alcoholics can become more severe, and then yet more severe, especially if somebody is picking up the messes they leave.  Constantly the decision has to be "in or out".  And if the decision continues to be "in", rationalizations have to enter, boundaries have to become blurred, the difference between right and wrong made problematic, lies have to be told.

I have been alienated from my brother since childhood, because we lived in a home where we both hid.  But I remember a specific moment, sitting at a kitchen table, in a "family meeting", where I basically gave him a simple decision: side with me and sanity, or side with them and lunacy.  He chose them, and I have had little honest to say to him since.

These moments are like what Edward de Bono called "catchment areas".  When rain falls on the ridge of a mountain, if it falls 1' one direction, it flows down one side, into a river far away.  If it falls 1' the other, it can flow into an entirely different system.  The Continental Divide is a great example of this.

Likewise, seemingly small decisions can have enormous consequences.  One small lie, can lead to another small lie, which leads to bigger lies, which leads to an entire world view built on sand, which requires continuous reinforcement.

I have from time to time mentioned "Judgement in Nuremburg", and the Nazi judge, played as I recall by Burt Lancaster, who asked Spencer Tracy "How could I have known it would lead to all this?"  Tracy replied "you knew the moment you sentenced the first innocent man to jail."

What I am feeling in the current emotional landscape, which is being emoted with political language, is that the Left is a big fucking codependent family.  This is their only family.  This is the only home they know.  They have spent countless hours lying and rationalizing and ignoring their own acknowledged moral standards, their own truths.  They sided with the alcoholic.  They cared for him because they needed him.  And now they don't know what to do.  They don't know who they are.  They have no benchmarks for honest moral judgments.  Their assumed superiority is unmasked as simple cowardice and self delusion.  And they stand naked to all the feelings that this cult allowed them submerge in outwardly rational activity oriented around what they were able to convince themselves was useful activity.

Where can they go?  Well, for starters, they could return to genuine Liberalism, to standards of thinking and behaving, to demands for honesty and integrity, to effective policy.

This is a whirlwind we are living in, a demented, demonic whirlwind.  I don't know when it will stop, and it seems likely to get worse in the short and medium terms.  But it is sick as hell, and we can only thank God these fascists are not operating under Hillary's protection.

The children of alcoholics

I have always assumed, as I think most people do, that the psychic damage of having an alcoholic parent comes mainly from seeing them drunk, from their failure to do their jobs as parents, from alcohol induced emotional instability.  No doubt this is a big part of it, although I do think every alcoholics relationship with alcohol is personal and unique.

But the more I think about it, substance abuse in any form is really just an Emergent Property of a dysfunctional system.  Alcoholics drink because they don't know how to manage their emotions, those particularly of fear, pain, shame, guilt, sadness and anger.  People talk about angry drunks.  Well, those people were already angry.  The alcohol just brought it out.  They drank to let it out, because they did not ever develop the emotional tools needed to process it and express it in healthy ways.

I have long said I am the child of two alcoholic parents who didn't drink, and I continue to believe this is a reasonably accurate description.  There are many people in this world who are vastly more fucked up than the worst drunk you ever met, and have simply learned to hide it from the world, and in most cases from themselves. I would go so far as to say that in some families, the drunks are the healthiest ones, because they have retained an awareness of unbearable contradictions everyone else has simply learned to conjure away in reverse hallucinations.  They appear to the world satisfied and happy, but on the inside it is the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  And the children of those families are asked: but your parents are so NICE.  What is wrong with you?

This is a virtually impossible question to answer for those who have not lived it.

I have spent most of this week alone, silent, living with who I am at my core, doing simple chores, sleeping a lot, and it seems to be bearing fruit.  The buzzsaw at my core seems to be winding down.  It is, after all, tired after all these years.


If you have no cave to retreat to when you are hurt, you learn to carry the cave with you.

I am realizing more and more that the process of emotional rehabilitation and growth is mainly doing less, not more.  You do not overcome fear.  You simply let it go away.  You do not overcome anger, or indolence.  You simply stop being angry, and start allowing your life energy to be productive and useful.

The act of relaxation is being alert and aware, but without any added complicating emotions.  It is being present.  That is what I am working on.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017


I thought I would do my small part to spread awareness of the plight of a badass women currently, apparently, incarcerated by the fucking Danes because violence, even in a great, noble cause, scares them, because they are pussies (no insult intended to this woman who has much bigger balls than I ever will):

Now, I want to be clear that in Scandinavia, and much of Europe generally, there is this fairy tale thinking that violence, and bad things generally, can be kept at bay with wishful thinking.  Joanna Palani (by the way, Joanna, I am single) makes that thinking unsustainable, with her tales of grotesque violence, and the solving of that violence through added violence.  Peace through markswomenship, we might call it.   Men with holes in their head are always ex-rapists.

Free Joanna Palani, you cowardly douchebags.


If 1% of the population of any given area showed up to any protest, it would be massive.  If 10,000 people showed up to a protest in an area with a million people, that would be huge.  America has about 300 million people.  That means if 300,000 people show up in Washington that is 1/10th of 1% percent of the population, or one person in one thousand.

Now, the AIM of the left wing fascists is to make it APPEAR there is a broad coalition of people opposed to Trump.  If one person in one thousand shows up to a protest, it LOOKS like a lot of people.

But the truth seems to be that roughly 57% of the population are active Trump supporters, and a sizeable number of the remaining people not lunatics.  But the lunatics want policy to be based on the perception they create because they are loud, aggressive, everywhere (living with your parents frees up a lot of time), and demanding.

Only a fucking moron--and I am speaking to our elected officials--would fail to grasp from the movement to the right that began in 2010, with widespread opposition to Obamacare, and has only continued to gather steam, that THEY KEEP THEIR JOBS ONLY IF THEY IGNORE THE LUNATICS.  The Democrats have lost 1,000 seats, and continue to double down on the same strategy.

It doesn't matter what happens at town halls. It doesn't matter what mail campaigns or protests or anything else they do.  They are a decided minority, most Americans hate them, and as should be obvious you only encourage bullies when they get what they want.

Fuck them.

Betsy DeVos

I didn't really follow the Betsy DeVos hearing, but the main stated public objection seems to be her lack of experience. It seems likely few of us have really cared that much about past Secretaries of Education, but let us assume they had the qualifications people like Al Franken wanted them to have.
Here is a simple question: given measurable educational results, and assuming for the sake of argument both that national education is properly a Federal responsibility and that this office is capable of achieving the aims set it, in what respect should we not view EVERY Secretary of Education for the past 40 years as an abject failure?
In every city in America, and a great many rural schools, we are graduating kids from high school--giving them diplomas--who can barely read, who can't do basic algebra, who don't know even the rudiments of American history, like who we fought in the Revolutionary War or how to find France on a map.
Conservatives have been proposing school choice since the 1970's, and been opposed on it since then by left wing Democrat backed teacher's unions. The one thing I have read consistently about DeVos is that her mandate is to foster school choice. Given our long term failures--ones not tied to funding, since we vastly outspend many nations which run circles around us--I for one fail to see why trying something different could possible be worse than where we already are.
This graphic clarifies the armies of administrators with Ph.D's making six figure salaries and delivering mediocrity, decade after decade:


Every Senator and every House member who does not take this opportunity to vote to repeal and replace Obamacare will face a, likely successful, challenge from the right in their next election.

We have Congress, a ready and willing President, and the most blatant mandate imaginable.  Obamacare was the beginning of the erosion of Democrat power in the United States.  It is a horrible law, which hurts 2 people for every person it helps.

All the Exchanges ever did was make available policies that the fucking Blue States would not allow ordinary carriers to provide.  They made individual policies available, where otherwise the options were COBRA or having a job with insurance.

Now, a lot of Obamacare, since it was a left wing creation, consists in subsides the rest of us pay--or which the government borrows on behalf of our children--and much more consisted in raising the amount of household income a family could make and still get Medicaid, but all this could be retained for a period of 2-3 years while people start self insuring on high deductible policies which we can still subsidize into the future.

There is something inherently better when people have skin in the game, which is what happens when you write checks to insurance companies, versus walking into government offices filled with slow moving fat people and demanding they give you things you deserve because you were born, and haven't done much with your life.

Monday, February 6, 2017

Economic progress and social progress

It seems likely to me that in societies where everyone lives comfortably, racism and other -isms largely disappear.  Most of the time true -isms are based either on ignorance or on the sense that somebody else is getting an unfair leg up.  Americans are very tolerant because the overwhelming bulk of us are fat, dumb and medicated.

Universal free markets will breed universal tolerance, in my view. But to be clear, when large corporations develop incestuous relationships with government, that is not a free market.  And to be even more clear, the reason people like Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and Jeff Bezos are Democrats is that a massive government is good for business.  Members of large governments can be bought.

Ironically enough, the very people claiming to want to protect the "little man" work consistently to fuck him over.

If you think ANYBODY consistently has your back, you are a fucking imbecile.  People do what is in their own interest.  Trump does not have your back, but he does have the fucking fuckers in his crosshairs.  He knows how they operate, what they do, how the tricks work.  He is the most honest national politician I have seen in my lifetime, even more than Reagan.  Trump doesn't seem how to not be honest, even if in times he has designated in his own mind as negotiation periods, he does play both dumb and crazy.

Yeah, he's so dumb he beat the Republican field without spending hardly any money, beat Hillary despite the overt and fawning support of nearly every media outlet on the planet, and survived both real and manufactured scandals to do it.

Leftist "medicine"

The basic fact of modern economic life is that economic progress fixes poverty.  Poverty is a problem which disappears when free markets are allowed to operate.  This has happened in country after country the world over.  And the converse has happened: any nation which seeks to control economic life empowers a small elite, usually protected by violent police, and impoverishes the mass of the people.

These claims are FACTS.  They are not subject to dispute by any honest economic historian.

What drives Socialists under their many names is not a benign desire to actually help people, but to FEEL like they are helping people, or in all too many cases, the obvious FACT that the larger the government, the easier it is to achieve tyranny.  If you depend on government for a job, for healthcare, for energy, for housing, for food, for education, then they have you by the balls, don't they?  They say "let me take care of that" for the same reason men buy women drinks in bars: they want to fuck you later.

Here is the point I wanted to make.  Most simple, common ailments, like headaches, colds, minor flu, bronchitis, aches and pains and the like fix themselves.  Some minor palliatives like analgesics might be warranted, but basically most people's bodies will heal themselves.  Our immune system does its job.  This is obvious, and the analogy I would draw is with poverty fixing itself if people are simply allowed to go out and pursue money their own ways.

Leftist economic theory, by contrast, keeping with the analogy, REQUIRES strong action in response to ALL ailments.  If there is any poverty, then all wealth must be nationalized.  If there is any inequality, everyone who is not a part of the power elite (don't skip those parties!!!) has to be taken down.

All colds require STRONG medicine, the most powerful broad spectrum antibiotic, even if it doesn't do anything, and destroys the digestive tract in the process.  All headaches need codeine, as much as needed, even if it breeds dependency.  The JOB of a doctor, on this rendering, is not to watch and wait, but rather in ALL CASES to prescribe the strongest "medicine" possible, even if it makes everything worse.  It is the process which matters--prescribing medicine--not the result--a healthy, independent patient--which matters.

I continue to think of China and India, which languished in abysmal poverty for decades prior to liberalizing markets and achieving something substantively close to instant relative prosperity.

Again: the FACTS are not in question.  The only possible debate is whether socialism IN THEORY is a moral creed.  In FACT it very clearly is destructive, angry, and hostile to everything in any of our cultures which gives people hope outside the State.

If I were in China I would argue for traditional culture, updated to improve the rights of women, minorities, gays, and others stranded outside that culture.

If I were in India, I would be arguing daily for the rights of the Dalits, for women, and others.  It was only the British who put a stop to the horrific practice of expecting widowed women to immolate themselves on their husbands funeral pyres.   They are also the ones who stopped the Thuggee cult.

Where in the world is sanity?  I continue to wonder why so many of our best minds preoccupy themselves with patent imbecilities.